SILLY SEASON: Killing the pig in a shark attack!

WEDNESDAY, JUNE 19, 2013

Part 2—Low-IQ pundits hunt bimbo: In fairness, when we’re killing the pig in a shark attack, things like this will happen.

Early Monday afternoon, Amanda Marcotte was killing the pig at Salon. In this case, the pig was Miss Utah, “whose real name is Marissa Powell.”

The night before, Powell, who is 21, gave an incoherent reply to a less than fully coherent question. Now, Marcotte and a school of low-IQ pundits were staging a ritual of the season—a new form of shark attack.

When we’re killing the pig in a shark attack, things like this will happen! Below, you see the headline which sat atop Marcotte’s piece—and the correction the brilliant scribe filed after she had pleasured her readers by chasing the “bimbos” around:

MARCOTTE (6/17/13): Miss Utah Said Something Really Dumb. Is It OK to Laugh at Her?

[...]

Correction, June 17, 2013: This post originally misspelled NeNe Leakes' first name.

Miss Utah said something really dumb! Also, Marcotte misspelled the first name of the person who asked the question which tripped the bimbo up.

For the record, NeNe Leakes came to fame on The Real Housewives of Atlanta, one of the cable grotesqueries which define the new Culture of Dumb to which these low-IQ pundits defiantly bow.

Regarding Marcotte’s misspelling of “NeNe,” we humans do make mistakes! And Marcotte was almost on the side of the angels as she took part in the new shark attack.

Marcotte was trying to see the big picture! “Cackling at bimbos is not exactly progressive,” the brilliant progressive scribe said:

MARCOTTE: This ritualized rooting out of the biggest bimbo at the beauty pageant is tough to reconcile. On one hand, it's kind of a cultural protest against the fact that beauty pageants, which feminists famously protested more than 40 years ago, continue to stick around in all their sexist glory. On the other hand, cackling at bimbos is not exactly progressive either. Hard to say which urge any random person is expressing when they pass along these videos.

Are pundits taking part in “a cultural protest” when they “root out the biggest bimbo?”

Whatever helps Marcotte sleep at night! If we got that question at a pageant, that is the answer we’d give!

Whatever! At Salon, Katie McDonough played it straighter while taking part in the shark attack. McDonough is supposed to be a journalist, not a pageant contestant. But she instantly erred:

MCDONOUGH (6/17/13): Sunday night was the 2013 Miss USA pageant, and while Miss Utah Marissa Powell did not take home the title, she did win the Internet’s scorn after failing quite spectacularly to answer a question about paying men and women equal wages for equal work.

“A recent report shows that in 40 percent of American families with children, women are the primary earners, yet they continue to earn less than men. What does this say about society?,” asked pageant judge and “Real Housewives of Atlanta” alum during the question and answer segment.

In fact, that question doesn’t refer to “equal pay for equal work.” Given a day to think it over, McDonough didn’t notice.

For the record, we’re not sure if we’ve ever seen McDonough make a coherent statement. And she is older than 21 and is supposed to be a journalist. Two questions:

Question 1: Does that mean that we should call McDonough the web’s biggest bimbo? (Our answer of course would be no.)

Question 2: Does McDonough know the difference between two issues: The fact that fully-employed women earn less on average than men, and the fact that women sometimes earn less than men for the same or comparable work? Being a self-acknowledged genius, does McDonough understand that these are separate questions?

It wasn’t clear which situation Leakes was referencing in her question. And she had the previous month to get her question together!

Tomorrow, we’ll recall the time when Rachel Maddow misstated this matter, then pretended, the following evening, that she had done no such thing. That is OK with sharks like Marcotte. Miss Utah’s fumbling is not.

Whatever! Around the web, and then around cable, the world’s biggest bimbos, boys and girls, began to swim after Miss Utah. It’s hard to know who was more disgraceful—worthless male children like Cooper and Hayes, who rolled their eyes at the silly girl clown (Chris Hayes—good God!), or pompous pseudo-progressive women like Wagner and Carmon (excerpts below).

Pathetically but predictably, Erin Burnett tried to take the counterintuitive route. Twice on Monday evening’s program, she teased an upcoming segment about Miss Utah’s response:

BURNETT (6/17/13): What would you do if your home was in danger of being engulfed in flames from a forest fire? The answer for some is to actually hire their own firefighters. But what does that mean? We have an Outfront investigation.

And then last night, Miss Utah rambled through her answer to a question on fair pay for women. And everybody is jumping all over her and humiliating her and all kinds of things. But you know what? Did she actually make a good point?

[...]

BURNETT: Next, disturbing images of a celebrity chef allegedly being choked by her husband. We're going to hear what he says he wasn't doing, what it appears he's doing.

And Miss Utah's answer to a question on last night's Miss USA pageant could, at best, be described as rambling. And that would probably be kind.

But you know what? Did she ultimately make a really good point about equal pay for women?

But first, tonight's Shout-Out! A dramatic rescue from a California mountain. Just watch this helicopter!

In fact, Leakes’ question did not specifically cite the issue of “fair pay” for women, although it’s possible that’s what she meant. And no:

Miss Utah did not “ultimately make a really good point” when she tried to answer the question, as Michael Medved quickly explained when Burnett assembled a panel—after we'd watched the celebrity chef being choked by her husband and the dramatic mountain rescue which featured the helicopter.

Burnett is paid millions of dollars per year to peddle this low-IQ crap to the public. Question:

Why don’t our brave little hustlers step up to the plate and call her “the biggest bimbo?”

Is the answer all too plain? We’ll offer our judgment below.

Burnett and Cooper embarrassed themselves. From an older male “progressive,” Hayes’ eye-rolling was a disgrace. But for our money, it was Alex Wagner and Irin Carmon who staged the evening’s most ridiculous session about Miss Utah.

Wagner was guest-hosting for Lawrence. She started the nonsense by describing something she thinks would be great:

WAGNER (6/17/13): So Marissa Powell did not win the competition last night. Erin Brady from Connecticut won—and we were looking into the duties of a Miss USA. And as Miss USA, Erin Brady will get posh digs in New York City and an opportunity to travel the world while promoting the organization and acting as a spokeswoman for breast and ovarian cancer awareness.

Now I think it’s really important and good to raise awareness about breast and ovarian cancer. But I also think, if you’re going to raise questions like the ones that were raised last night about gender equity and pay equity, it would be great if Miss USA and the contestants in the Miss USA pageant could talk about the issue of pay equity and gender equity and the way society treats men and women and perhaps talk about the Pew Research analysis from 2011 showing there is a massive income gap among breadwinner families, single moms, married moms, and a whole host of other issues which pertain to women shattering the quote unquote "glass ceiling."

Going on and on and on, Wagner explained what she thinks would be great. We think it would be great if champagne came out of her ears as she made such pronouncements.

That said, we noted the slightly puzzling logic of Wagner’s statement, which she had a full day to prepare. After all, it wasn’t Miss Utah who “raised questions like the ones that were raised last night about gender equity and pay equity”—nor was it clear that Leakes’ question went to issues of “equity.”

Should contestants be prepared to discuss every issue when they aren’t the people who bring issues up? In a perfect world, it would happen that way. Of course, in that perfect world, the always tightly scripted Wagner most likely wouldn’t be on the air.

Carmon extended the tribal nonsense. Several analysts covered their ears. Others emitted low, mordant laughs:

CARMON: Look, I think, you know, I don’t look for a property that is owned by Donald Trump to be evincing perfect feminist values. Many of the women who have competed in these pageants are very intelligent. It does not appear that Marissa Powell is the most articulate spokeswoman for them. But you know, she doesn’t sound that much better than a lot of Republican leaders. I mean, look at some of the statements by elected members of Congress where they say, for example as Marsha Blackburn did, that women don't want equal pay.

Powell didn’t sound much better than a lot of Republican leaders! In this way, a grasping child gave us our tribal gruel.

Powell, who is 21, did quite poorly as she tried to answer a slightly jumbled question. That said, people like Wagner are surrounded, on a nightly basis, by the people who truly are society’s biggest bimbos.

Chris Matthews has been a gigantic bimbo for years—and his deeply destructive conduct has actually changed the world’s history. His pal, Maureen Dowd, has invented the terms of modern upper-end bimboism.

You will never see grasping figures like Wagner say any such thing on the air. They will kick down at young, powerless people. They will kiss up to the stars.

Can we talk? These are terrible, horrible people—greedy, grasping, clutching climbers who have their hands deep down in your pockets. They have to please you to make you watch. And they have to make you watch to keep hauling in their large hauls.

“Erin Brady will get posh digs in New York City!” Thus spake Wagner, on a channel which pays its bimbos, boys and girls, well into seven figures.

On Monday, kicking way down, our bimbos staged a shark attack. They will never, ever tell you who the real bimbos are.

Tomorrow: April 2012

Carmon got it right: A few months ago, a piece by Carmon brought us right out of our chairs.

Say what? The sub-headline on her piece trashed Maureen Dowd by name! Incredibly, this is the way the piece ended:

CARMON (2/28/13): Sadly, one of the original sins on this front was a New York Times piece by Jodi Kantor that quoted [Sheryl] Sandberg saying she’d always thought she’d “run a social movement” alongside concerns that she was loftily lecturing the less fortunate. The Times ran a correction that clarified the context—Sandberg was saying she’d been immersed in the nonprofit world and didn’t expect to find herself in the corporate one—but plenty of unfair damage has already been done, including in an opportunistic column by Maureen Dowd, that lectured Sandberg on how true social movements are built. Dowd’s mockery of Sandberg, including in her headline, for calling herself a “pom-pom girl for feminism” also failed to note that it was a joke in belated response to a sexist comment from Tip O’Neill. Dowd, of course, has never needed a 140-character limit to traffic in reductiveness and phony umbrage. Some things are timeless.

Can Irin Carmon say that?

Not any more! Signing off on Monday night, Wagner announced her ascension:

CARMON (6/17/13): So yes, women are seeking more education. They’re filling the ranks of the educated people. It’s not actually making difference for the wage gap. The Paycheck Fairness Act, which has gone in and out of Congress, has been blocked by Republicans. Sometimes women who are making less money don’t even know.

So wage transparency, you know, there’s a lot of measures we could do to help when it comes to this.

WAGNER: That is how to turn a negative into a positive, which is what our—what NeNe Leakes suggested Marissa Powell do. We hope she takes our advice and Nene’s advice.

Irin Carmon, a new member of the MSNBC family, Welcome! We are so happy to have you. Congratulations and thank you for your time tonight.

Pompously, Wagner prayed that Miss Utah will take her advice—and Nene's advice, of course. We hope Powell stays a million miles away from such world-class hustlers.

Whatever! Wagner then welcomed Carmon into the fold. Question:

As a (paid) member of the family, will Carmon ever say those things about Dowd on the air? You can bet your cable-chewed ass that Wagner never will!

Wagner will kick down aggressively at the kids—and she will kiss up at the stars. This is the way the game is played by the world’s biggest hustler bimbos, including the boys and the girls.